World media, Kelly Slater react after surf darling gets publicly executed: “It’s all fun and games until Sally Fitzgibbons is marched to the guillotine!”

What if I were to tell you that surfboard shapers are evil creatures seeking to keep the whole of humanity locked into embarrassing mediocrity so that they can go to surfboard shaper conferences or hang out in surfboard shaper bars and mock and laugh and laugh?

Come ponder.
by Chas Smith
- Shares
  
  0
- 0
Feral war of words erupts following surfing’s first trans competitor’s dominant performance in women’s longboard contest, “Trans-girls aren’t going to take over the world, we just want to be included, we’re humans too”

"More so-called political correctness gone mad for the one percent."
by Derek Rielly
- Shares
  
  0
- 0
Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

A tutorial on how to cling to a flying trapeze, every fibre at breaking point while trying to postpone the inevitable fall.
by Derek Rielly
- Shares
  
  0
- 0
Caitlyn’s son, Kendall and Kylie’s brother Brody Jenner in committed amorous relationship with Ultimate Surfer Tia Blanco: “The pair had an instant connection over their shared love for the ocean!”

Hot couple summer!
by Chas Smith
- Shares
  
  0
- 0

What if I were to tell you that surfboard shapers are evil creatures seeking to keep the whole of humanity locked into embarrassing mediocrity so that they can go to surfboard shaper conferences or hang out in surfboard shaper bars and mock and laugh and laugh?

Come ponder.

Feral war of words erupts following surfing’s first trans competitor’s dominant performance in women’s longboard contest, “Trans-girls aren’t going to take over the world, we just want to be included, we’re humans too”

"More so-called political correctness gone mad for the one percent."

Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

A tutorial on how to cling to a flying trapeze, every fibre at breaking point while trying to postpone the inevitable fall.

Caitlyn’s son, Kendall and Kylie’s brother Brody Jenner in committed amorous relationship with Ultimate Surfer Tia Blanco: “The pair had an instant connection over their shared love for the ocean!”

Hot couple summer!

Breakout Jackass star Poopies favoured to win Best Kiss at MTV awards over Robert Pattinson & Zoë Kravitz despite PETA labelling stunt with Texas Rat Snake “cruel” and calling for LA county prosecutors to “take appropriate legal action”!

Zoophilia hits the mainstream!

Professional surfers jumping back and forth from Challenger née Qualifying Series to Championship Tour support Albert Einstein theory of insanity!

Change is good.

Cape Hatteras beachfront homes fall into sea at prime surfing location as shifting environmental landscape continues haunting the rich and famous!

Calling all illegal burritos.

传奇人物凯利斯莱特获得急需的李ft as august Hollywood Reporter endorses lightly worn OuterKnown: “Zac Efron and Jason Statham are among the Hollywood stars who have worn pro surfer Kelly Slater’s brand!”

It IS Ok!

Mammy of Gabriel Medina goes nuclear in interview concerning son’s short-lived marriage to Sports Illustrated model Yasmin Brunet; says Gabriel “started to go weird” and “I knew it wouldn’t last. It wasn’t love!”

"Gabriel is intense in everything. He is intense to fall in love, intense in everything, and passion ends."

Big-wave world champ and LGBTQ+ icon Keala Kennelly reveals her “self-hatred for being gay” and how playing straight on the world surf tour nearly killed her, “I spent the majority of my time on the pro circuit in the closet completely terrified to come out!”

“I actually quit the tour shortly after I came out because I couldn't handle mentally and emotionally what that was like."

Maths whizz reveals the exact number of seconds riding waves it takes to win a world surfing title over the course of one season !

The world's least demanding sport!

Saint Sally Fitzgibbons falls to eventual champion Caitlin Simmers in semifinals of Boost Mobile Pro as mainstream media turns attention to plight of Owen Wright: “It is undignified and beyond comprehension that a man of his stature, an Olympian no less, should be treated so barbarously!”

Save Owen!

From the archives:Horse-racing enthusiast who swindled $1.5 million from world surfing champ Tyler Wright and her brothers Owen and Mikey pleads guilty to 749 charges of theft, “I’ve f’ed up and it got out of control”

World media, Kelly Slater react after surf darling gets publicly executed: “It’s all fun and games until Sally Fitzgibbons is marched to the guillotine!”

What if I were to tell you that surfboard shapers are evil creatures seeking to keep the whole of humanity locked into embarrassing mediocrity so that they can go to surfboard shaper conferences or hang out in surfboard shaper bars and mock and laugh and laugh?

Feral war of words erupts following surfing’s first trans competitor’s dominant performance in women’s longboard contest, “Trans-girls aren’t going to take over the world, we just want to be included, we’re humans too”

Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

Caitlyn’s son, Kendall and Kylie’s brother Brody Jenner in committed amorous relationship with Ultimate Surfer Tia Blanco: “The pair had an instant connection over their shared love for the ocean!”

What if I were to tell you that surfboard shapers are evil creatures seeking to keep the whole of humanity locked into embarrassing mediocrity so that they can go to surfboard shaper conferences or hang out in surfboard shaper bars and mock and laugh and laugh?

Feral war of words erupts following surfing’s first trans competitor’s dominant performance in women’s longboard contest, “Trans-girls aren’t going to take over the world, we just want to be included, we’re humans too”

Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

Caitlyn’s son, Kendall and Kylie’s brother Brody Jenner in committed amorous relationship with Ultimate Surfer Tia Blanco: “The pair had an instant connection over their shared love for the ocean!”

Breakout Jackass star Poopies favoured to win Best Kiss at MTV awards over Robert Pattinson & Zoë Kravitz despite PETA labelling stunt with Texas Rat Snake “cruel” and calling for LA county prosecutors to “take appropriate legal action”!

Professional surfers jumping back and forth from Challenger née Qualifying Series to Championship Tour support Albert Einstein theory of insanity!

Cape Hatteras beachfront homes fall into sea at prime surfing location as shifting environmental landscape continues haunting the rich and famous!

传奇人物凯利斯莱特获得急需的李ft as august Hollywood Reporter endorses lightly worn OuterKnown: “Zac Efron and Jason Statham are among the Hollywood stars who have worn pro surfer Kelly Slater’s brand!”

Mammy of Gabriel Medina goes nuclear in interview concerning son’s short-lived marriage to Sports Illustrated model Yasmin Brunet; says Gabriel “started to go weird” and “I knew it wouldn’t last. It wasn’t love!”

Big-wave world champ and LGBTQ+ icon Keala Kennelly reveals her “self-hatred for being gay” and how playing straight on the world surf tour nearly killed her, “I spent the majority of my time on the pro circuit in the closet completely terrified to come out!”

Maths whizz reveals the exact number of seconds riding waves it takes to win a world surfing title over the course of one season !

Saint Sally Fitzgibbons falls to eventual champion Caitlin Simmers in semifinals of Boost Mobile Pro as mainstream media turns attention to plight of Owen Wright: “It is undignified and beyond comprehension that a man of his stature, an Olympian no less, should be treated so barbarously!”

From the archives:Horse-racing enthusiast who swindled $1.5 million from world surfing champ Tyler Wright and her brothers Owen and Mikey pleads guilty to 749 charges of theft, “I’ve f’ed up and it got out of control”

US doctor responds to insane fury after solo-surfing Jeffreys Bay during Coronavirus lockdown: “I hate that I provoked such anger!”

Iron Fist: Manhattan Beach surfer cops $1,000 fine for “disrespecting a lifeguard” during “Reign of Coronavirus Terror!”

Photographer captures up-close image of Great White shark’s “sinister sneer” thereby proving apex-predators’ penchant for “sadism and evil!”

Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

Mason Ho ditches gloomy Scotland for rock-and-cock POV tubes on a barely habitable island in Fiji, “I stick to what the audience needs, which doesn’t really change all that much!”

Mason Ho in his wildest Scottish adventure yet, “The ghost of Dirty Dick is still in search of Little Nell!”

Witness: The Great White “was going like a rocket straight at us. I can see it so clearly, its mouth was open. I lifted my feet, grabbed the board…”

Watch: Jackie Dorian, Badger Daddy and Pals in “Pretty People Oughta Hitch Up with Pretty People!”

Watch: Big Daddy Ho and chillun in “Hush up your blasphemin’, Lucifer, and let me loose!”

World media, Kelly Slater react after surf darling gets publicly executed: “It’s all fun and games until Sally Fitzgibbons is marched to the guillotine!”

What if I were to tell you that surfboard shapers are evil creatures seeking to keep the whole of humanity locked into embarrassing mediocrity so that they can go to surfboard shaper conferences or hang out in surfboard shaper bars and mock and laugh and laugh?

Feral war of words erupts following surfing’s first trans competitor’s dominant performance in women’s longboard contest, “Trans-girls aren’t going to take over the world, we just want to be included, we’re humans too”

Hawaii’s queen of crazy Mason “Dirty Nell” Ho releases final, epic sequence from hair-raising month-long romp through Scotland, “His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul!”

Caitlyn’s son, Kendall and Kylie’s brother Brody Jenner in committed amorous relationship with Ultimate Surfer Tia Blanco: “The pair had an instant connection over their shared love for the ocean!”

From the archives:Horse-racing enthusiast who swindled $1.5 million from world surfing champ Tyler Wright and her brothers Owen and Mikey pleads guilty to 749 charges of theft, “I’ve f’ed up and it got out of control”

Eat beach grit spam!